definitely when i was a 12 year old girl .. i experienced a lot of trauma that takes place in my mind for several years!
i thought i was NOTHING , a meaningless one ..
just like the other EMO thinks ..
akala ko noon i was alone ..
i blamed God for everything ..
i thought that no one could understand me ..
i hate everything ..
till God revealed me everything ..
now that i am serving Him, following and believing on Him ..
He told me that i am a PRECIOUS ONE ..
He created me because He loves me ..
He wants me to be with Him in eternity ..
now that i am with Him .. and have forgiven all of my sins ..
although i failed Him,i disobey him, still He loves me ..
He is the one who truly loves and understands me ..
=))
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
the father's day special
early in the morning as i was washing the dishes my father turn on the radio and later i hear the melody of the song ..
sounds familiar ..
that song was ANAK by freddie aguilar ..
i was about to cry na after hearing that song ..
i am a PAPA's girl ..
i am much more comfortable with my father ..
suppeerrrr..
then a flashback came out my mind ..
it reminds me the father's day ..
i am a christian .. the only christian in our family ..
so they can't be with me when i am worshiping God ..
our church held a father's day celebration on church wherein the father's attended there will stand in front of us ..
my father is not there..
but i've seen the father of A.Meg(my bible study leader) he was standing there .. at that moment i dreamed of my father..
that he too was standing there waiting for us(his child) to give him a big hug and kiss ..(SAD)
now i know ..
many realization come up my mind ..
that still .. our parents LOVE us ..
from the song "ANAK"..
try to hear the song a lot of times till you realize that ..
our parents love us ..
even though we fail them ..
we disobey them.. we rebel against them ..
i can still remember, when i was sick .. so sick .. my father wake up at early 12midnight and he checked me .. he waited until 1am and been there beside me .. binabantayan niya ako.. he placed also a wet face towel on my forehead ..
i came not from a wealthy family, i came from a messed up family ..
all of my life i thought life is just a damn ..
but when i met the greatest Father of all--the Creator of heaven and earth ..
after knowing him ..
i do learn how to accept the things happening around me ..
i know God has a purpose why he brings me birth and growing up with this family ..
as what the bible says "God has a purpose for everything."
i leave it to God ..
sounds familiar ..
that song was ANAK by freddie aguilar ..
i was about to cry na after hearing that song ..
i am a PAPA's girl ..
i am much more comfortable with my father ..
suppeerrrr..
then a flashback came out my mind ..
it reminds me the father's day ..
i am a christian .. the only christian in our family ..
so they can't be with me when i am worshiping God ..
our church held a father's day celebration on church wherein the father's attended there will stand in front of us ..
my father is not there..
but i've seen the father of A.Meg(my bible study leader) he was standing there .. at that moment i dreamed of my father..
that he too was standing there waiting for us(his child) to give him a big hug and kiss ..(SAD)
now i know ..
many realization come up my mind ..
that still .. our parents LOVE us ..
from the song "ANAK"..
try to hear the song a lot of times till you realize that ..
our parents love us ..
even though we fail them ..
we disobey them.. we rebel against them ..
i can still remember, when i was sick .. so sick .. my father wake up at early 12midnight and he checked me .. he waited until 1am and been there beside me .. binabantayan niya ako.. he placed also a wet face towel on my forehead ..
i came not from a wealthy family, i came from a messed up family ..
all of my life i thought life is just a damn ..
but when i met the greatest Father of all--the Creator of heaven and earth ..
after knowing him ..
i do learn how to accept the things happening around me ..
i know God has a purpose why he brings me birth and growing up with this family ..
as what the bible says "God has a purpose for everything."
i leave it to God ..
playing a game so eagerly
i was so tired from night-long wakefulness just because of playing a game !!
yes a game ..
hahaha !!
game from a handphone ..
haha !!
funny isn't it?
that i wasn't able to sleep the whole night just because of playing cellular phone ..
i also asked myself why i was doing that ..
then a phrase came out my mind as i was askin' myself..
"i was so eager doing this because i want to be placed my name at the TOP."
and suddenly i also thought ..
"why was people wasn't that eager to search for God's word?"
they're too busy with other things ..
such as internet, cellphones, friends ..
they are too busy with that ..
why don't we give our time searching for God's word?
we really need that rather than spending and wasting our time with senseless things that can't fulfill us ..
God's word can fulfill us .. can fill us happiness and love and everything what God is ..
LESSON:
HINDI NA AKO MAGPUPUYAT FOR A SENSELESS PURPOSE SUCH THAT .. TO PALACE MY NAME AT THE TOP .. I'LL BE MORE EAGER TO SEARCH FOR THE WORD OF GOD THAT TEACHES ME TO BE RIGHTEOUS..
yes a game ..
hahaha !!
game from a handphone ..
haha !!
funny isn't it?
that i wasn't able to sleep the whole night just because of playing cellular phone ..
i also asked myself why i was doing that ..
then a phrase came out my mind as i was askin' myself..
"i was so eager doing this because i want to be placed my name at the TOP."
and suddenly i also thought ..
"why was people wasn't that eager to search for God's word?"
they're too busy with other things ..
such as internet, cellphones, friends ..
they are too busy with that ..
why don't we give our time searching for God's word?
we really need that rather than spending and wasting our time with senseless things that can't fulfill us ..
God's word can fulfill us .. can fill us happiness and love and everything what God is ..
LESSON:
HINDI NA AKO MAGPUPUYAT FOR A SENSELESS PURPOSE SUCH THAT .. TO PALACE MY NAME AT THE TOP .. I'LL BE MORE EAGER TO SEARCH FOR THE WORD OF GOD THAT TEACHES ME TO BE RIGHTEOUS..
Monday, June 14, 2010
I WANT YOU , I LOVE YOU
definitely , im in-love ..
to whom?
hahahaha ..
it's him whom i love much more than before ..
i haven't seen him yet i love him ..
who?
its Christ ..
i want to be with him forever and live in eternity with him ..
im inspired ..
haha !!
superrrrrrrrrr !!!
know why?
im so blessed ..
i have a lot of answered prayers ..
means ANG LAKAS KO KAY GOD =))
yea .. kanya kanyang conclude lang yan ..
sobrang saya ko now that i have him again at nakabalik na ako sakanya ..
probably many of my friends wouldn't believe this that i am now in Christ again ..
i onced was fall but now im found ..
yea maybe i am unworthy but God is faithful and just and will forgive me to all of my sin ..
this is a promise and i proved it ..
God never fails to his promises ..
only, we have to have faith and believe him in all he do ..
he has a purpose for everything ..
just trust him ..
and i do ..
i surrendered to him a lot of things i enjoyed here on earth but i've learned that material things here on earth wouldn't lasts .. but the love of Christ for us would lasts !
many are also asking me what benefits will i get here in serving the Lord , they say that i am just wasting my time ..
but Jesus spoke to me and say that there's no material things here on earth will be my reward but my reward is in eternal life =))
that was an awesome promise ..
isnt it?
i may be tired all day long but the happiness and the joy and the feeling of fulfillment in doing this things are the rewards for me ..
haha !!
sobrang dami ko ng natututunan about life and marami na rin nagbago sakin ..
such as .. i dont need someone .. i need God .. i dont need such things .. i need eternal things .. i dont have to be loved by someone but i am loved by my God ..
wala nga akong lovelife , nor barkada but still im happy living with the Lord my God .. =))
=)) THE PURPOSE-DRIVEN LIFE and the HOLY BIBLE
AACL 24
to whom?
hahahaha ..
it's him whom i love much more than before ..
i haven't seen him yet i love him ..
who?
its Christ ..
i want to be with him forever and live in eternity with him ..
im inspired ..
haha !!
superrrrrrrrrr !!!
know why?
im so blessed ..
i have a lot of answered prayers ..
means ANG LAKAS KO KAY GOD =))
yea .. kanya kanyang conclude lang yan ..
sobrang saya ko now that i have him again at nakabalik na ako sakanya ..
probably many of my friends wouldn't believe this that i am now in Christ again ..
i onced was fall but now im found ..
yea maybe i am unworthy but God is faithful and just and will forgive me to all of my sin ..
this is a promise and i proved it ..
God never fails to his promises ..
only, we have to have faith and believe him in all he do ..
he has a purpose for everything ..
just trust him ..
and i do ..
i surrendered to him a lot of things i enjoyed here on earth but i've learned that material things here on earth wouldn't lasts .. but the love of Christ for us would lasts !
many are also asking me what benefits will i get here in serving the Lord , they say that i am just wasting my time ..
but Jesus spoke to me and say that there's no material things here on earth will be my reward but my reward is in eternal life =))
that was an awesome promise ..
isnt it?
i may be tired all day long but the happiness and the joy and the feeling of fulfillment in doing this things are the rewards for me ..
haha !!
sobrang dami ko ng natututunan about life and marami na rin nagbago sakin ..
such as .. i dont need someone .. i need God .. i dont need such things .. i need eternal things .. i dont have to be loved by someone but i am loved by my God ..
wala nga akong lovelife , nor barkada but still im happy living with the Lord my God .. =))
=)) THE PURPOSE-DRIVEN LIFE and the HOLY BIBLE
AACL 24
my purpose, our purpose
do you know your purpose of your life?
why you are here in this world?
why you are now living? breathing?
do you know the main purpose why you created here in this world?
probably, i answered this NO at first when i asked about this ..
yes, i don't the reason why am i living for ..
maybe you too ..
but, fortunately there's one good thing to know why we are here ..
but of course we still don't know our purpose yet ..
im happy living here ..
while reaching and attaining my goals in life such as fulfulling it ..
but you know what?
its self centered reasons ..
yet that's not our purpose ..
have you ever asked yourself about it?
the purpose of your life?
me? i asked it a lot of times but i failed to know it so ..
until one day after reading the THE PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE by Rick Warren i was so inspired knowing that there's still a way to know your life's purpose ..
it all starts with GOD !!
start in him ..
because we are made BY God and For God ..
life will never makes sense without God ..
he is the beginning of all ..
he created you so he do know why he created you ..
if you asked him he will answer you ..
if you'll be going to ask me what your purpose is even your parents doesn't know why you are created ..
they are just the way used by God for you to live ..
but God created you so he know why you are created ..
GO LIVE WITH GOD AND START DISCOVERING YOUR PURPOSE ..
GROW IN CHRIST =)
GOD BLESS =)
why you are here in this world?
why you are now living? breathing?
do you know the main purpose why you created here in this world?
probably, i answered this NO at first when i asked about this ..
yes, i don't the reason why am i living for ..
maybe you too ..
but, fortunately there's one good thing to know why we are here ..
but of course we still don't know our purpose yet ..
im happy living here ..
while reaching and attaining my goals in life such as fulfulling it ..
but you know what?
its self centered reasons ..
yet that's not our purpose ..
have you ever asked yourself about it?
the purpose of your life?
me? i asked it a lot of times but i failed to know it so ..
until one day after reading the THE PURPOSE DRIVEN LIFE by Rick Warren i was so inspired knowing that there's still a way to know your life's purpose ..
it all starts with GOD !!
start in him ..
because we are made BY God and For God ..
life will never makes sense without God ..
he is the beginning of all ..
he created you so he do know why he created you ..
if you asked him he will answer you ..
if you'll be going to ask me what your purpose is even your parents doesn't know why you are created ..
they are just the way used by God for you to live ..
but God created you so he know why you are created ..
GO LIVE WITH GOD AND START DISCOVERING YOUR PURPOSE ..
GROW IN CHRIST =)
GOD BLESS =)
Friday, June 11, 2010
the battle of nightmares
JUNE 11 exactly at 12 midnight i fell asleep ..
a dream came to me ..
too vague ..
too dark ..
i can only hear screams ..
i can only see myself lying on my bed ..
suddenly on that setting ..
i saw someone standing beside my bed ..
i didn't know who it was but i was so afraid to look at it ..
and looking at the window, i also saw someone outside knocking ..
he knocked so loud that i was so nervous .. i felt so cowardly ..
the one knocking on my window wanted me to open it and let him enter my room ..
i knew i was just dreaming ..
but still i trusted the Lord ..
i prayed and shouted JESUS many times and i tried to look at the man standing beside me ..
then i woke up ..
that was just a nightmare but i saw myself and the demons who wanted me to be with them ..
i looked at the clock and it was exactly 3:30 am!
i was so nervous that i found it hard to go back to sleep ..
so i decided to read the verses in the bible to make myself calm ..
and it made me so ..
it made me calm and feel secure ..
what great things Jesus has done for me ..
he is the one standing beside my bed ..
He's so great !
amazing !
in order to win the spiritual battle, we need to read the scriptures or the word of God and let God's will be done. your burdens--leave them to God and He will surely give you wisdom on what to do.
TRUST GOD IN EVERYTHING!
a dream came to me ..
too vague ..
too dark ..
i can only hear screams ..
i can only see myself lying on my bed ..
suddenly on that setting ..
i saw someone standing beside my bed ..
i didn't know who it was but i was so afraid to look at it ..
and looking at the window, i also saw someone outside knocking ..
he knocked so loud that i was so nervous .. i felt so cowardly ..
the one knocking on my window wanted me to open it and let him enter my room ..
i knew i was just dreaming ..
but still i trusted the Lord ..
i prayed and shouted JESUS many times and i tried to look at the man standing beside me ..
then i woke up ..
that was just a nightmare but i saw myself and the demons who wanted me to be with them ..
i looked at the clock and it was exactly 3:30 am!
i was so nervous that i found it hard to go back to sleep ..
so i decided to read the verses in the bible to make myself calm ..
and it made me so ..
it made me calm and feel secure ..
what great things Jesus has done for me ..
he is the one standing beside my bed ..
He's so great !
amazing !
in order to win the spiritual battle, we need to read the scriptures or the word of God and let God's will be done. your burdens--leave them to God and He will surely give you wisdom on what to do.
TRUST GOD IN EVERYTHING!
Thursday, June 10, 2010
..was dead and is alive,was lost and is found again!
my theme song while writing this blog is the song, STILL by Hillsong ..
i cried the second time realizing many things God has made me realize ..
yes .. i am a believer of Christ; and, i've known Him since I was seventeen .. and that was last 2009, before my 18th birthday ..
i grew in Him .. i knew how great He is; but, there were things which wrong ..
my interpretation of all of the things i've known about Him ..
i gave much focus on the things i do than on the reasons why im doing them ..
i lost my way as a result..
i took the path which was not for me
and have sinned against heaven and His name ..
i was unworthy and sinful ..
until one day i got sick .. i felt like dying ..
hirap na hirap na ako that time ..
every night i experienced nightmares and it made me feel so afraid of everything ..
i was afraid and felt so weak ..
until some words which says,
"LEAVE EVERYTHING AND TRUST ME", came up my mind, and
which I believe God had told me.. i followed
and surrendered everything ..
WEDNESDAY of JUNE 2 i was so sick until JUNE 9 ..
nearly, i was about to be confined today, JUNE 10 ..
but yesterday, the Lord spoke to me ..
He told me that i had to leave everything and trust Him ..
at that point when i agreed and followed Him,
instantly, i was healed !!!!!
i know now the purpose of everything ..
i was lost .. but now, here He is, calling me again for the second time ..
GOD IS LOVE !!
He really loves us !!!!!
* ung sakit ko po ay flu .. nung nagpacheckup ako, nalaman namin na masyadong mataas ung count ng white blood cells ko .. normal count of WBC must be around 10,000 cumm .. pero yung sakin ay umabot ng 11,000 cumm .. sobrang hirap na hirap ako kasi gabi-gabi ako binabangungot .. what's weird about it is that, every 2am, nagigising ako .. at pag hapon hanggang gabi, sobrang taas ng lagnat ko ..
IM SO BLESSED ..
GOD MADE ME SO SPECIAL ..
WHY SPECIAL?
BECAUSE HE MADE ME NEW AGAIN !
HE FILLED ME AGAIN WITH LOVE AND JOY =D
PRAISE GOD !!!
CONTINUE BELIEVING IN HIM AND HE IS SURELY WITH YOU FOREVER ..
LUKE 15:24
JOHN 3:16
i cried the second time realizing many things God has made me realize ..
yes .. i am a believer of Christ; and, i've known Him since I was seventeen .. and that was last 2009, before my 18th birthday ..
i grew in Him .. i knew how great He is; but, there were things which wrong ..
my interpretation of all of the things i've known about Him ..
i gave much focus on the things i do than on the reasons why im doing them ..
i lost my way as a result..
i took the path which was not for me
and have sinned against heaven and His name ..
i was unworthy and sinful ..
until one day i got sick .. i felt like dying ..
hirap na hirap na ako that time ..
every night i experienced nightmares and it made me feel so afraid of everything ..
i was afraid and felt so weak ..
until some words which says,
"LEAVE EVERYTHING AND TRUST ME", came up my mind, and
which I believe God had told me.. i followed
and surrendered everything ..
WEDNESDAY of JUNE 2 i was so sick until JUNE 9 ..
nearly, i was about to be confined today, JUNE 10 ..
but yesterday, the Lord spoke to me ..
He told me that i had to leave everything and trust Him ..
at that point when i agreed and followed Him,
instantly, i was healed !!!!!
i know now the purpose of everything ..
i was lost .. but now, here He is, calling me again for the second time ..
GOD IS LOVE !!
He really loves us !!!!!
* ung sakit ko po ay flu .. nung nagpacheckup ako, nalaman namin na masyadong mataas ung count ng white blood cells ko .. normal count of WBC must be around 10,000 cumm .. pero yung sakin ay umabot ng 11,000 cumm .. sobrang hirap na hirap ako kasi gabi-gabi ako binabangungot .. what's weird about it is that, every 2am, nagigising ako .. at pag hapon hanggang gabi, sobrang taas ng lagnat ko ..
IM SO BLESSED ..
GOD MADE ME SO SPECIAL ..
WHY SPECIAL?
BECAUSE HE MADE ME NEW AGAIN !
HE FILLED ME AGAIN WITH LOVE AND JOY =D
PRAISE GOD !!!
CONTINUE BELIEVING IN HIM AND HE IS SURELY WITH YOU FOREVER ..
LUKE 15:24
JOHN 3:16
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